What is Billy Grumbling About?

Billy is a 5-year-old male mixed breed rescued dog, who my client has had for just over a year.

Frances:  Hi Billy – how are you? 

Billy:  I’m good, why?  Who are you?

Frances:  That’s good to hear.  Your mom asked me to talk with you, is that ok?

Billy:   Sure, why not?  Anything for Mom.

Frances:  Great.  Do you know that your family loves you very much?

Billy:   I hoped so, it seems like it.  Is there something wrong?

Frances:  No, not at all honey.  I’m just letting you know that this is your forever home. You can be assured that you will not be living with any other family.

Billy:  Oh, I’m so glad you told me that.  I was really not exactly sure, but hoped that it was true. YAY for me!

Frances:  I’m happy you are happy.  That will make Mom happy too.  So now I have questions that Mom is asking, is that ok?

Billy:    Yes, of course.

Frances:  When you sound like you are grumbling, what are you trying to tell Mom?

Billy:   It depends on where we are and what we are doing.  In the kitchen, I want food or a treat. Sometimes I’m just trying to tell her that I love her.  Or maybe I want to go for a walk, a ride or who knows what.

Frances:  So it’s never just one thing all the time?

Billy:  Yep, just like us talking now – it’s different words, only I can’t say them like this to her.

Frances:  I understand. Do you like living with your family?

Billy: What’s not to like?  I have food, love and a roof over my head.  I can’t ask for more than that, can I?

Frances:  Well, let’s say you could ask, but you won’t necessarily get it, you know?

Billy: Yeah, I get it.  But I can try, right?

Frances:  Of course you can.  What else would you like to do more of?

Billy:   Now that I know I am staying, I would like to go on more car rides.  I was always afraid I would be dropped off and left like my other family did to me.

Frances:  I’m sorry that happened to you.  That will never happen to you again.  If they drop you off someplace, they will always come back and get you.

Billy:  Thank you, that is good to hear.

Frances:  Does your body hurt anywhere?

Billy: No, I’m good.

Frances:  Why do you sleep by yourself at night?

Billy:  I always have so I didn’t know it was ok to join the others in the house.

Frances:  Even though Ruby was in the house before you, she looks up to you to follow your lead and behavior.  When you are on walks in public, can you be calmer?  Pretend everyone is a friend, unless they show you otherwise.  Staying calm and near your mom is best.  Just being next to Mom or whoever you are walking with, is the best way to stay calm.  No barking or grumbling when in public.  It is sometimes scary for others to understand you are being friendly.

Billy: But I am being friendly when I talk.  

Frances:  Yes, but others don’t understand that, so best to be quiet and calm while in public.

Billy:  Ok, I’ll try that next time.

Frances:  Thank you, Billy.  I’ll be talking with Mom a bit later this morning.  Bye for now.

Billy:  Bye and thank you for talking with me.

Frances: You’re very welcome.

For the Love of Animals,

Frances

 

Pete's New Home

Rehoming a pet after a loved one has passed is never easy, especially on those left behind to grieve their loss – including the cat. 

 Frances:  Hi Pete – I understand your mom passed away, and now you are living with your mom’s daughter and her cat, Suzy.

Pete:  Yes, that is what is happening with me.  So why do I have to stay here?

Frances:  Well, what would be the alternative?  Living on the streets without food, water, and a roof over your head.

Pete:  Yeah, I guess that could be a concern.  I do like to eat.  I just don’t like this pesky cat that is already here.

Frances:  Why don’t you like her?

Pete: She acts like I invaded her space.

Frances:  But really, that is what happened.  It isn’t her fault you are there.  It isn’t anybody’s fault – it is what life is.  Sometimes it is very unpredictable.  Can you stop fighting and pouncing on Suzy?  She hasn’t done anything to provoke this behavior.  Has she? 

Pete:  No, not really.

Frances:  Your home is big enough for both of you.  You don’t have to be in the same room at the same time.  Why don’t you sit near a window and watch the birds outside or play with the toys that are around?  Your new mom is upset that you are making it difficult for Suzy to relax with your aggressive behavior.  What do you think?

Pete:  Yeah, I have been a bit rough on her.  I know my new mom has been upset with me.  I’ve been upset too with Mom being gone, too.  I suppose I can stick to myself and allow my new mom to grieve without me adding to her worries.

Frances:  Mom would really appreciate that.  I can talk with you again if you need to get anything off your chest, so to speak.

Pete:  Thank you, I would like that.  Please tell  Mom I will do better.  I’m sorry I have been so aggressive to Suzy – I will do better.  I guess I need more time to grieve, too.  

Frances:  Thank you, Pete.  I’m rooting for you.  Be good to yourself, too.

Pete: I will. Thank you for talking with me.

Frances:  My pleasure, Pete.

For the Love of Animals,

Frances

 

Lillie's Furever Home

While sharing a tea with my neighbor Teri, she mentioned our other neighbor Rebecca had recently (last Saturday and this was only Tuesday) adopted a dog from the local rescue shelter. She mentioned the dog was afraid and she wasn’t eating or drinking so Rebecca was really concerned about the new dog. I asked Teri if she would contact Rebecca. She was closer to her than I and suggest that I come over and speak with Lillie, the new dog. Rebecca was thrilled. She texted me and the next morning I went to see her new adopted dog Lillie.

When I arrived I realized she had weaned puppies very recently and was wearing a collar as she had been fixed prior to her adoption as well. I spoke with Lillie telepathically letting her know she was loved and safe and this was her new mommy and her new home. She was so surprised how quiet it was. She’s so used to the barking and yelling and all the stuff that goes on at the shelters. Lillie was moved to multiple shelters before she came to live with her new mom. I told her all the toys, all the food, all the water, even the comfy beds in the living room and the bedroom were all for her. She was so used to sharing. She was afraid she was gonna fight off another one just to be comfortable - poor baby. I did notice her water bowl was quite large so I suggested putting a smaller one as she seems to be so overwhelmed with things. The more contained that they can be the more she’ll get used to them. As Rebecca and I were talking, I noticed Lillie was getting more and more comfortable even to the point where she was laying, curled up in her bed with her back to us, not a care in the world. The next day, her mom texted me this: 

Hi Frances! Lillie is doing wonderfully - more relaxed, eating, and drinking her water. Thank you again!!! 

For the Love of Animals,

Frances

 

New Kid in Town 🐱🐈‍⬛

 

I recently had a session for a client with two cats.  This is how it went. 

Frances:  Hi Sally – how are you?
Sally:  I’m ok, why?
Frances:  Your mom asked me if I would talk with you, is that ok?  
Sally:  Yeah, I guess so, what about?  
Frances:  Do you like your new family?  I understand you have been there for about a year.
Sally:  It’s ok, but why did that other cat have to come too?
Frances:  Missy needed a home just like you did.  She is now your sister, why can’t you be nice to her?
Sally:  Why should I be nice to her?  She’ll take all my food.  
Frances:  There will always be enough food for you and Missy.  Your mom will always ensure you are both taken care of with a roof over your head and food in your tummies.  Do you know that you are loved, and this is your forever home?  
Sally:  What do you mean by “forever home”?  I’ve never been in one home for very long at all.  I’d get in a fight and that was it, I was moved to another place, then another, then another.  I don’t trust anyone anymore and that’s a fact.
Frances:  I’m sorry you haven’t had the kind of life you deserve.  But you do know if you’ll allow your mom to love you like you deserve to be loved you have it now.  A forever home is where you will stay for the rest of your life.  You will have the same home with your mom and sister named Missy.  This is your forever family, and it is there for you to open your heart and love and be loved.  Does that make sense? 
Sally:  I think so but how can I believe you?
Frances:  Just give it time.  You don’t have to take my words only, just allow each day to unfold with the knowing that you are loved, you have plenty of food in your tummy, and a roof over your head for your safety.  Can you do that?  
Sally:  I suppose I can try.  
Frances:  Good for you, that’s taking a positive step forward.  One step at a time, right?
Sally:  Yeah, ok – I see what you’re doing here.  I know I’ve put up a good wall to protect myself, I’ve had to.  Nobody did anything for me just because they wanted to.  I always felt like a burden, and they let me know it.  I liked being outside because then I didn’t have to deal with the people and their problems.  They yelled and screamed all the time at each other, and I just got in the way.  I do have to say my life here is nothing like that and I really do appreciate all that I am given, really, I do.  I was afraid it would be a repeat of the past and I would be moving on to another place, so I didn’t want to get my hopes up and open my heart just to get broken again, so I stopped trying.  I see that it is different this time and now that you mention it, I do feel I can relax more and allow the love they have to offer to sink in.  Yeah, even with Missy, I think I can do that too.  Thank you for talking with me, I do appreciate your words very much.
Frances:  Thank you, Sally.

 

For the Love of Animals,
Frances

Happy National Pet Day!

April 11th is National Pet Day which is a day dedicated to encouraging the adoption of orphaned pets into a loving furever home. #NationalPetDay #PetRescue #PetAdoption

Note from my client: 

Sweet Pea

"Sweet Pea was adopted from Frosted Faces in Ramona 5 months ago. Her wisdom DNA says she is 45% Chihuahua but I don’t see it. I’ve had estimates of her age as between 8 and 12 years old. She’s a girl. I would like to be able to find out how much she is able to see and hear. To my mind, she is blind and deaf but I know there’s something there."

My conversation with Sweet Pea:  
Frances:  Hi Sweet Pea – How are you?

Sweet Pea:  I’m ok [she sounds very timid].

Frances:  Do you know you are loved and safe with your new mom? She will never give you away or hurt you in any way. This is your forever home. You can relax and just enjoy the rest of your life.

Sweet Pea:  Are you sure?

Frances: Yes, honey, I am sure. She is a very nice lady, and you will always have food and a roof over your head. And. especially lots of hugs and kisses if you’ll let her.

Sweet Pea:  Oh, that sounds really good to me. Thank you for telling me that. I was afraid this was just another place I was staying until they get tired of me and then I go somewhere else.

Frances: Can I ask how you are seeing? How are your eyes?

Sweet Pea:  Well, not as good as I used to but I can see images that are big.  Because I don’t always hear people coming, I’m afraid I’ll get stepped on, so I like to go under stuff.

Frances: So, you don’t hear very well?

Sweet Pea:  Not really well, I feel like everyone mumbles and I feel the vibration on the floor when they come.

Frances: Your new mom suspected you had issues with your eyes and ears so now she knows. This is no problem for you or Mom, it can be expected when you get a little older. It happens to people too.

Sweet Pea:  So, she won’t be mad at me?

Frances: No honey, she won’t be mad at you. She knows you need some help to feel comfortable in your new home. Is there anything you would like to tell Mom?

Sweet Pea:  Thank you for taking me home with you. I wasn’t sure if you were going to keep me or not, so I guess I was holding back. That’s part of why I run away when you want to pick me up. I was afraid you were going to put me in a container and take me someplace else to live. I am happy you want to keep me. I will try to be the best dog I can be. I would like to be able to receive hugs and kisses from you. It’s been a long time since I trusted anyone to do that. Many times I was picked up and thrown around by kids who really didn’t know better and parents who didn’t pay attention. Please be patient and I will try to overcome my fears and insecurity. Talking with this lady really helped me to understand I’m staying. That’s a big deal to me. I’m so very happy to hear this news. Thank you again for doing this for me and I will be the best dog that I can be.

Frances: Thank you, Sweet Pea. That is a lovely message for your new mom. I will be talking with her shortly. Bye for now.

Sweet Pea:  Bye, thank you again for talking with me. I can already feel myself being more relaxed.

Frances: That’s wonderful to hear Sweet Pea. Talk again soon.

Sweet Pea:  Ok bye.

For the Love of Animals,
Frances

 

Happy Paw-lidays!

 Wishing you a Paws-itively Perfect

Holiday & New Year

 

Rescued pets have a special place in my heart.  They are sometimes fostered in various homes or taken from a home for unforeseen reasons.  They aren’t included in the details of what happened and why they are no longer staying in this home, with this mom or dad.  They react as scared beings as though they are just expected to pick up their life where they left off – but they have fears and feelings like we do.  Consider the understanding at the child-like level where they are unsure of their surroundings or the people who are now in their life.  All the love in the world can’t help or fix their fears – that’s where I come in and explain and answer their questions.  I hope I can help your rescued pet one day. 

Here’s a bit of Rudy’s story:

Rudy is an 8-year-old Tibetan Spaniel who was surrendered to the shelter with no history.  He was adopted 3 months ago by his new family and is very timid and hides in the closet when he is afraid.  They love him very much and want him to be happy.  Here is a portion of our conversation, and a bit of a revelation of his past.

Hi Rudy – how are you?
I guess I’m ok why? 

Your family asked if I would talk with you, is that ok?
I guess so but who’s my family?

The nice people who you are living with, who feed you and pet you and love you.
So, am I staying here? 

Yes, honey this is your forever home.  This family loves you and will take care of you forever.  Does that make sense? 
I suppose so.  I wasn’t sure why I was here, but I do like them.  Sometimes things are a bit loud and so many different things going on.  I kind of wish it was quieter.  I like the quiet.  I get very scared with so many people moving around me. 

I will let them know so maybe being more aware of that can help you settle down and relax more. 
Thank you that would be helpful.

Do you miss your previous home?
Yes, very much.  My mom was an older lady who didn’t come home one day so I was taken away.   [I feel she was hospitalized and then passed away.]

I’m sorry that happened.  I’m sure she loved you very much, but life happens out of our control sometimes.  You now have a loving family to care for you and love you.  Are you ready to open your heart to them?
Yes, thank you for telling me that.  I guess I thought maybe I did something wrong, so she left me.  I was sad thinking if I did it again, they would abandon me too.  I’m feeling better now that you let me know I didn’t do anything wrong. 

Slowly but surely, you will get more comfortable with your new family and surroundings.  Allow them into your heart.  You can trust them.  They will not hurt you.
 Oh, I am so glad you talked with me.  I’m feeling better already. 

You’re very welcome, Rudy. Just take it one day at a time and ease into your new loving family. Ok?
Ok bye.

For the Love of Animals,
Frances

Adopting a New Pet: Finding the Right Companion

Adopting a New Pet:
Finding the Right Companion

Adopting a new pet after one has transitioned can be tricky, especially when there is a surviving companion grieving the loss. When is it OK? Grieving appears with signs such as loss of appetite, lack of desire to thrive and sleeping more than usual. Just like humans, the animals grieve the loss of a loved one.

In doing this work of animal communication, I have found the pets who stay behind, while in their grief, or even a year or two later, can be very possessive of their owners. Introducing a new pet, without asking them first, can create havoc. There can be jealousy of the new pet or anger at you for bringing in another. How can you replace their dear companion?

Norton is a 15-year-old domestic shorthair orange male cat that was not keen on the new dog joining the family.

Norton:  Why did he get the dog? Wasn't I enough? Is he going to replace me? I try to be good. I've been giving him more attention since the dog's been here - why is he so loud? He doesn't let me sleep in peace. I just want to be left alone and he comes and sniffs around me.

Me:  The dog needed a good home so dad brought him home - you can share dad can't you?

Norton:  I suppose - as long as he doesn't eat my food - I eat all my food so he won't get it.

Me: You don't have to do that - there will always be enough for you - I'll make sure dad puts your dish where the dog can't get to it, OK?

Norton:  OK that will help - thanks. Tell dad I love him OK? I don't get to say that to him so he understands.

Bubba, a cat that was depressed as he was missing the daughter (he called "mom") that was away on vacation and he was overhearing conversations of her going away to medical school:

Bubba:  Why did mom leave me? I know they love me too - but I miss my mom. Bring mom back or take me to her.

Me:  I asked if hearing her voice would help. Sometimes it can help to put the phone on speaker and having the pet hear the voice of the person they are missing.

Bubba:  Yes, hearing her voice will help. I like my food. My other moms are nice, but they aren't mom. My house is nice, my bed is nice. I miss my mom. I want my mom.

Me:  Playmate?

Bubba:  Maybe - but I'm the boss. Maybe a girlfriend? I might like that - I never had a girlfriend before. One that looks like me? I'd like that - yeah that could be fun.

When my client is thinking of bringing in another pet, after the loss of a dear companion, I tune in to the surviving companion for guidance. Have they cleared the grieving process? Is there anger towards the owner for "taking their companion" away? Do they understand the death process? Are they seeing their companion's spirit around them?

Excerpts taken from my books: What Do Your Pets Want You to Know?, More Messages from the Animals, and Lessons from the Animals available on Amazon and Kindle.

For the Love of Animals,

Frances

Learn the Health Benefits of

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Discount Adoption Fees 

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See Me on the Tina Anderson Show

The Tina Anderson Show!

My visit with Tina where we talked about what animals want us to know and what happened when I spoke to Tina's furry friend, Zorro. 

Barks of Love Bark Bash

I am excited to be a vendor at the 2nd Annual BARK BASH Family friendly / Pet friendly Fundraiser to benefit Barks of Love Animal Rescue Sunday, April 24 12pm - 4pm Hosted by: 3101 W. Harvard St. Santa Ana, CA 92704 Music, food, vendors, drawings and much more!

June is Adopt a Cat Month!

Help celebrate Adopt a Shelter Cat Month by visiting the cats and kittens at the Mission Viejo Animal Services Center.  Millions of cats and kittens nationwide are waiting for their forever homes, including many currently available at the Center. 

Here are some ways that you can help cats during this special month:

1.   Adopt -  The Mission Viejo Animal Services Center has reduced adoption fees for all kittens until June 7 and for most adult cats through the entire month of June. Come to the shelter to meet the amazing cats and kittens waiting for their new families.

2.   Donate - The Mission Viejo Animal Services Center has a wish list of needed items.  Donating any of these items is a great help to the animals awaiting their new homes.

3.   Foster -  The Center has an extensive foster program for kittens, and new foster parents are always needed

4.  Spay and Neuter - SpayUSA reported that an unspayed female cat, her mate, and all of their offspring could produce as many as 370,000 cats in as little as 7 years! Contact the Center for a referral to a local low cost spay/neuter clinic.

Free Pet Adoptions!

Photo credit & source info from Patch.com

Its the perfect time for your family to adopt a new pet from Orange County's OC Animal Care, the county run animal services center.  Adoption fees will be waived for qualified applicants.

Based in the city of Orange, the OC Animal Care is county run, and has been operating at over 95-percent capacity for nearly a month, since they took in a large quantity of rabbits from an area residence.

The facility is currently housing approximately 630 animals.

According to the shelter, that is over 200 more animals than the services typically works with.

“High numbers of animals increases the impact on the physical and mental health of shelter animals,” Dr. Jennifer Hawkins, director of OC Animal Care said. “By removing fee barriers to adoption and encouraging visitors to the shelter, it is our goal to unite adoptable shelter pets with families.”

On October 25, the Orange County supervisors agreed in unanimous vote to authorize OC Animal Care to waive adoption fees anytime its animal population grows more than 80 percent of capacity. The free fees will continue until it drops below 60 percent.

Adoption fees normally average $167 for dogs, $171 for cats and $77 for rabbits.

That cost covers spaying and neutering animals, veterinary services, implanting and registering microchips, and administering vaccinations.

Take note, even with the fee waiver, adoptive families of their new pets will still have to pay for a rabies-vaccination certificate to the tune of $27.

No animals can be surrendered at the shelter until the number of animals in residence drops back to 60-percent.

Find available pets at Petfinder.com

Bob's Unusual Pet Family

Luiz Higa Junior of São Paulo, Brazil, says that his golden retriever, Bob, is a little less than two years old. In the beginning, he just had Bob, a cockatiel and a parakeet. 

“Since the beginning I put them together to see their behavior,” he tells us. “It was nice, so I decided to have them play together sometimes during my free time.” 

He then added more birds and a hamster to the group.  You can now see the group posing, playing, exploring, and resting together. 

My new dog is acting funny after a surgical procedure......

Castle is an Austrailian Labradoodle.  He will soon be a year old.  We have only had him for a couple of weeks.  There are 3 other dogs in the home.  Last week he had a procedure on his vocal cords and he has been acting funny.   We want to know how he is feeling.  

Hi Castle, how are you?

Oh I guess ok.  

Can I talk with you?

Yeah – what about?  

I understand you are in a new home – what do you think?

I don’t know – how long am I going to be here?  Why did they take me to the doctor and cut me?  Are they going to do this again?  Why did they do this to me?  

Castle, this is your new forever home.  The procedure was necessary – but you will not have to do this again.  Your family has invited you into their beautiful home.  They are a loving family and you are now a part of their family.  You now have 3 other dogs to play with and a family to feed you and make sure you have a long, healthy and happy life.

So they aren’t going to give me back if I get into trouble?  

(No, honey, but hopefully you will not get into trouble on purpose right?)  

No, of course not – but I have to learn their rules – I don’t know them yet and I’m afraid I’m going to do something wrong and they will give me away like the other family did. They said I got too big and I had to go.  I couldn’t help that I’m a bigger dog – they thought I would be a lap dog – well I was when I was a puppy – but they should have looked at my feet – I guess they just didn’t know better. 

I’m sorry that happened to you  with the other family – but this family love you just as you are.  They welcome you with open arms and want you to be happy.  Is there anything you would like to tell them? 

Please tell them I am happy they chose me and I will not disappoint them.  I will be a good dog – just please don’t take me back to the vet and leave me there.  

Honey they will only take you if it is absolutely necessary for your health.  They want you to have a healthy long life with them. 

OK – just checking.  They are very nice and the food is really good.  I think it is the best food I have every had.  I’m still sore, but when I get get better I would like to run – in a park if I can – I like running free – but I will come back to them – now that I know they are my family – thank you for telling me.  I was afraid this was just a stopping point until I healed.  I was afraid to heal completely because I thought that’s when I thought I would have to leave.  I feel so relieved that I can begin to heal properly and learn to be happy again – to love again – to be a puppy again without fear of what will happen to me.  Thank you for talking with me – this has really made me a happy dog. 

You’ are very welcome Castle.  Enjoy your life with your new family and I will talk to your mom very soon.  

Ok bye. 

During the call  the client was amazed that Castle came and sat with them – this is something he had not yet done.  He was keeping a distance so he would not get too close – physically and emotionally – as he thought this was just a temporary home for him.

Adopting a New Pet

Adopting a new pet after one has transitioned can be tricky, especially when there is a surviving companion grieving the loss. When is it ok? Grieving appears with signs such as loss of appetite, lack of desire to thrive and sleeping more than usual. Just like humans, the animals grieve the loss of a loved one.

In doing this work of animal communication, I have found the pets who stay behind, while in their grief, or even a year or two later, can be very possessive of their owners. Introducing a new pet, without asking them first, can create havoc. There can be jealousy of the new pet or anger at you for bringing in another. How can you replace their dear companion?

When my client is thinking of bringing in another pet, after the loss of a dear companion, I tune in to the surviving companion for guidance. Have they cleared the grieving process? Is there anger towards the owner for "taking their companion" away? Do they understand the death process? Are they seeing their companion's spirit around them?

To present the idea of a new pet into the home, I broach the subject with compassion. I ask the pet if they would mind another companion who is homeless? Will they allow their owner to assist another pet and bring them into their home to share their love? This approach appeals to their compassion for the other pet instead of seeing them as competition for the owner's attention, love, food or toys. I assure them there will be enough attention, love, food and toys for both of them.

I also ask if they have a preference: a two-year-old cat versus a kitten, a female versus a male. Yes, the animals have their preferences if they are asked.